"What's the difference between pure water and Eva (notice I didn't say Ashton Wells)"?????? The packaging! Inside all na water! The same goes for life in Lagos, it's all about how you package yourself! I don't mean just physically here, I mean (I don't know the English), but I mean your brand, who you are, who you want to be, who you want people to see you as, the kind of people you want to be associated with (islanders, mainlanders), the kind of places you are associated with (Skye lounge, Mr. Biggs) the quality of your product (you, your attributes, old money, new money, no money, funny, boring, brazilian, synthetic, out going, prude, kind, harsh, tall, short, fat, slim, beautiful, beautiful after 3 hours of make up, intelligent, thicker than 2 short planks, etc. etc.). It's all about the colour of the wrapping paper you are covered in!
Over the last couple of years that I've lived in Lagos, I've watched and studied people, and i find it very remarkable how a "neighbourhood chick / guy", suddenly has everybody drinking his / her Kool-Aid This is an ART!! The greatest art form of all time! Some call them social climbers, but I'll stick with senior executive brand consultant! I took this art for granted, you know, you eventually just take people for who they sell themselves as. But here is the breaking news for those who have filled themselves up on Kool-Aid (cherry, blackcurrant, orishi rish flavours) perception is reality, but perception isn't real! (I'll break that down, it's been a long day at work I know -- what you perceive a person to be is the reality to you, but your perception isn't necessarily the real them).
Nigerians sabi chop branding, we are the most materialistic and fickle bunch if people on earth. Nobody cares to find out what the content is, as long as the packaging is nice, everything else na just extras, bonus, jara, awoof!
*As long as your dropping your kids off at school in a Porsche it doesn't matter if you haven't actually paid their school fees for 2 terms
*As long as you feature in style magazine every Sunday doesn't matter who "borrowed u" the dress u wore to snap the photo
*As long as you are drinking Ace of spades it doesn't matter if it's "i owe u" wey you take pay after everybody leave finish
*As long as you speak the Queens it doesn't matter what "learn English in 2 weeks" tape you've been listening too
*As long as your "ile mi hire" is all did up, doesn't matter if all na tokunbo, bend down, second hand..... Oh pardon me, I mean vintaggggge
*As long as your wardrobe is S/S 11, from the shoes, to the pants to the bra, it doesn't matter who your *Chairman* is
*As long as you're always full of life and energy it doesn't matter how long you're standing in the line for the bathroom
I guess i just feel like if we focus all of our energy on being ourselves, uninhibited, real, down to earth, people would love us more than the Madame Tussaudes version of us - stiff as wax, lifeless, and just FAKE sha
It would be quite hypocritical of me to say all this and be trying to sell my own guava Kool-Aid to you. I think I am as real as I can be: I talk a lot, a lot of rubbish at that, I moan constantly, I am very needy, I am overbearing, i am random, I love to watch period dramas and cartoons, i cant spell to save my life...but that's me, no point in hiding it, and I think some people love me (I hope, I may be deluded ...at least my 'rents love me sha).
However if you aren't such a great person, whichever way you slice it, then errr I don't mind offering my services as your brand consultant ;-)
Xoxo
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